As we were sitting at the Delta hub, waiting for our plane, it occurred to me that I don’t really do well with being patient at the airport (much less other places). Sitting around waiting was terribly annoying; however, I found a cool, pseudo-useless gadget … the Quick Charger! It’s a nifty little do-dad that ou can pay $3 to charge your device of preference for 30min. The best part was that there are about 20 cable that are 6″ long to plug your whatever in. I figure that this must be some sort of marketing major’s idea because it had blinking light, neon, shinny stuff, and other sort of seizure hoopla all over it, but only a few places to actually “hold” your gadget. So I guess the idea is that you pay $3 to stand for 30 minutes at the airport holding your cellphone into the precariously designed metal sticks whilst being accosted by the seizure box. I can imagine it would be more entertaining to have 20 people trying to use this magic box at the same time. Man, I would pay for that picture … 15-20 business people trying to charge & email on their BlackBerrys while a gang of 12 year olds fight to get the last iPod jack … and they are epilepting. But now its time to get on the plane and actually get the heck out of dodge.
Just one more side note, I found that Continetial allows GPS usage after 10,000 ft. As you can imagine, I was extremely disappointed that I didn’t own a GPS because I would have loved nothing more that to provide our exact path in GPS way points for our entire trip. Oh well, maybe I’ll get lucky an find one from Crazy McSanchezes House of Stuff for the return trip.
Spending time on a flight to Mexico takes up a lot of time in my opinion. I don’t see why jets aren’t faster. They need like an extreme class for passengers like myself where they subject you to Mach 70 speeds and throw you out of the rocket with a parachute and scuba gear; however, it does give me time to enjoy the meal on the jet. My favorite part is the “after dinner trash n’ smash challenge.” Basically, I attempt to compact everything into the smallest package possible. It’s extremely reminiscent of my days in Philmont when the various base-camps would require your trash to be so compacted it would bounce before you could throw it in their dumpster … not something trivial when you are trying to pack/hike around garbage for 16 people.
So back to the ADTnS Challenge. For the meal, a turkey sandwich … trash left:
- 1 sandwich wrapper with sticker
- 1 1oz Frito Lay bag
- 1 Milky way wrapper, fun size
- 1 Mayo packet, Lite
- 1 4.5″ x 6.5″ x 1.5″ food tray
- 1 SOLO cup with 3 cubes of ice
- 2 small napkins
Trash Smashing Strategy:
- Fold napkins into tiny fourths
- Mayo packet horizontal at the bottom of the Frito bag
- Insert napkins into Milky way wrapper
- Align Milky way with Mayo
- Roll up Frito bag and then fold into thirds
- Chipotle-burrito wrap sandwich paper around Frito bag
- Secure with sticker
- Final Size Estimate: 8-10 inside tiny tray or 3 inside cup after the ice melts
At this point, it’s time for us to fill out the customs forms for entering the country. Never having done this before, I didn’t have a fricken pen and of course they ran out of them. While filling out the form, I came to the great revelation that: a) I don’t remember any Spanish and b) I hate forms. We landed on what I could only describe as a parking lot big enough to fit 1/2 of a 727, but hey, still in one piece. The customs experience was without issue other than me getting a dirty look because “I” didn’t push the button on the conveyor belt that “they” scan your luggage with. What the significance of me pushing the button is I’ll never know.
Since we needed to get to Playa del Carmen from Cazumel, we had to get to the ferry, and to get to the ferry, you have to take a bus … and by bus, I mean a cargo van packed with like 12 other fat Americans. Our driver took our bags and put them in and then we piled in the van … and then more people came and it was just a hoot to be in the van, er, bus. So Speedy Gonzolas’ distant relative is driving us around and all the sudden we stop in this back ally. The driver gets out and the guy in front of me gets out … and they just leave … to the local brew through and come back with 2 12packs of Sol and start passing them out in the car. I’ve never been more freaked out in my life. First because there was alcohol in the car (no the driver didn’t have any, they all just drive like they are trashed) and secondly because all I could think of was getting tossed in jail for an open container in Mexico. Eventually, we were ejected at the site of the ferryy (only $10 to get to Playa) and crossed the channel. Our hotel was about 16 blocks up from where we docked so we got hazed by all of the street vendors, something you’d better get used to if you go to Mexico
Once we got to the hotel, we pretty much crashed (it was such a nice hotel, Aventura de Mexicana) and turned on the Mexican commercials about “Liftys.” No where in America would the FCC let you get away with a commercial about anti-boob sag products … but hey, it’s Mexico and if you buy a set now, they throw in a free set of “diamond cutter reducers.” (Yes, the video is censored, but I wouldn’t watch it at work.)